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Archive for the ‘Opinions’ Category
It’s Mostly The Beats
Wednesday, February 17th, 2010Saigon – The Greatest Rapper You Never Heard
Saturday, January 23rd, 2010
It’s sad that it’s come to this. It’s been almost 10 years since I first heard of Saigon. I covered his first vinyl single “Say Yes” back in 2001 for a now-defunct underground hip-hop website ran by a fat fuck with a Napoleonic complex and imaginary wife. It was also the year of the Jay-Z-Nas beef and a million subliminals, but there was something to Saigon that kept me intrigued. He had a certain intangible quality that made you wanna track down everything he’s ever done and cherish it. Back then I described him as “An artist whose whole style is throwback with a razor-sharp new millennium swagger.” Maybe it’s the rap nerd in us (me) that makes us (….me) compare all new rappers to those that came before. The desire to designate lineage, to determine who influenced who, and how. With Sai, he combined everything that was great about hip-hop to me: the street storytelling techniques of Kool G Rap, the intelligent lyricism of Nas, the intricate rhyme patterns of Rakim and the unbridled passion of 2Pac. To boot, he even had the undisputed credibility to speak about the lifestyle he vividly detailed in both sorrow and glorification.
In my own opinion, he was the most talented rapper to debut in the 00s. (more…)
Timlaska’s Top Ten-est albums ever (#9)
Thursday, January 14th, 2010
To recap last week we started our Top Ten-est Best Rap Albums of All Time with our number ten selection Kanye West’s Late Registration. Today we will take a look at #9. I was torn between two albums from the same artist for my #9 spot. Hard to Earn and Step in the Arena by Gang Starr, the first being the classic album everyone seems to hold as their go to and the second the classic album where they first made the leap from run of the mill to great. I have since been sitting with both albums and comparing and contrasting to see which one deserves this slot. To figure this out I think we need steal an idea from Bill Simmons and break them down Dr. Jack style to see who wins.
Beats – It’s hard to argue that during this period there was nobody better than primo. His work from Step in the Arena through Hard to Earn stand out as one of the strongest three album periods for any producer, and that is not even including his production with other artists. For me it was a matter of what worked better through the entire album. Both albums have a cohesive feel and where Step in the Arena is more consistent throughout, it can’t match the high points that are featured on Hard to Earn. Songs like Code of the Streets, Mass Appeal and Dwyck feature some of the greatest beats ever dropped. On top of that he dropped beats that made the two Group Home appearances listenable. I would take away points because there are beats that lack and show the early signs of Primo’s movement towards a one dimensional sound that would hound later Gangstarr efforts. It is hard to point out a weak production moment on Step in the Arena which for my dollar is the high point in jazz inspired production. I really can’t call it here; I wouldn’t kick the production from either of these albums out of bed but if I had to pick at gun point…
Edge: Hard to Earn but just barely.
Timlaska’s Top Ten-est albums ever
Thursday, January 7th, 2010I recently decided that I needed to put together the definitive list of the top 10 bestest hip hop albums of all time. It is an on-going process which I hope will finally put this discussion to rest. I have set up some ground rules that include the following:
1. No albums released before 1988 or after 2005 are eligible, when the last great rap album (Kanye West’s Late Registration) was released. Sorry Raekwon, Cuban Linx two was good but not great. We need to be honest with ourselves in that historical significance and record sales have nothing to do with the quality of the record, which is why you won’t find any Run DMC, EPMD or Dre on here.
2. The album must still be good. I don’t care if it was great in its heyday, if it isn’t good today it won’t be considered. You need to compete in all eras of the music to be considered one of the all time greats, again see any Dre or Snoop album.
3. If half the album sucks it doesn’t matter how good the rest of the album is, so this rules out all NWA albums, all BDP albums, all Eric B and Rakim albums, and so on. Many of the most impactful albums in rap music were half bad. They were fortunate that they came at the right time and the portion of the album that was great was revolutionary enough that they could ride into the history books.
4. We will not confuse a long career of good with a onetime moment of trancendent greatness. Jay Z while a great MC with many great songs never had a trancendent moment. The same goes with Biggie Smalls. While Ready to Die is a great album it’s not trancendent and just because he died early we like to remember him as the greatest ever, when in reality he was probably top 10-15.
5. Any album on this list must get the “I see where you can make a case for this being on here even if I don’t agree” seal of approval.
6. The album must be known to at least a few hundred thousand people. This means no obscure underground shit. If your album wasn’t good enough to spawn some sort of movement, even if it was just among active hip hop fans then you aren’t on here.
7. Finally – No Tupac….he fucking sucked. Tupac fans are right up there with white kids with dreads and vice interns as the most annoying group of people ever.
This is going to be a long journey, it will probably take us at the very least a few months to get through it all but I imagine that by the time we are done you will agree that this is the most complete list of the top 10 rap albums ever:
Coming in at number 10 we have the aforementioned Kanye West with Late Registration. Originally I had this ranked higher at number 7. Partially because I feel it is a phenomenal album and partially because I knew placing it that high would piss people off and start up some discussion. When I bounced the idea off some friends I consider to be knowledgeable on the subject they all felt the mere inclusion of Kanye in this list would spark the same discussion and emotions. So I rightfully moved it to the 10 slot, the album is only four years old and has yet to stand the test of time.
You probably think I am crazy for including Kanye on this list, but I as I make my case I hope you see my point. I think we can all agree that as a mc Kanye ranks between Phife Dog on the low end of the spectrum and maybe big Boi on the high end. Two 2nd fiddles in legendary groups, who were great as a complimentary voice to the lead vocals of Q-Tip and Andre 3000 respectively. Both have ventured into solo territory with varying degrees of success, Phife being an unadulterated failure and Big Boi having some marginal success and a few good jams. The difference is Kanye was able to pull off the average mc making a great album, outside of Guru he is the only subpar MC to make this list.
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Steady Hatin – 2009 The Year In Hate
Thursday, December 31st, 2009Being that we are world class hatologists and it is the end of the year it is only right that we recap all of this years people, places and things that deserved our hate:
octomom
Alaska I dont hate her as much as i hate people that give a fuck about her.
Blockhead Like most people, I hate her never ending vagina but i also hate that she looks like angelina jolie if she was a two week old water logged corpse.
A-Rod
Alaska – He finally got his title but he still has purple lips and dates a 14 year old boy with a blond wig….oh thats kate hudson? my bad.
Blockhead – Never trust a man with manicured eye brows and highlights in his hair.
Lady Gaga
Alaska – It lets you know how much new york sucks now when she is the most interesting thing to come out of new york since 9/11.
Blockhead – Lady Gaga has the image of a lunatic avante guarde street performer yet creates the music that makes drake look like mozart. Because of this, she sucks. She also very likely has a small non-functional penis but that’s more funny than anything.
Glen Beck
Alaska – He is a blue collar comedy performance artist right?
Blockhead – I’ve never seen or heard this guy talk. All i know is that the looks like a guy who will likely have a heart attack in the near future and he probably has morton downey jr breath
Tyler Perry
Alaska – like oprah with a beard, and i dont mean steadman…BOOM!
Blockhead – Another guy whom i’ve never seen or heard. From what I can gather he’s some sort of transexual deacon, right?
Kate Gosling
Alaska – Cuntiest face ever
Blockhead – Cuntiest cunt ever! But seriously, caring about her is almost as bad as being her.
Adam Lambert
Alaska - Jack Lambert is rolling in his grave
Blockhead – As is Christopher Lambert. word to the Highlander.
Sarah Palin
Alaska- Her face has the same shape as the guy in mask:
Blockhead – I’d hit it.
Bret Favre
Alaska - I actually love watching his annual December/January collapse.
Blockhead – I’m not a big football guy so I really can’t say much about this squinty ginger.
Michael Jackson
Alaska - Another dead creep, see you in hell fucker. Fuck him and fuck people who are saddened by the news, they should be sterilized.
Blockhead – I was playing basketball when I heard he died. I stopped for a second then continued with my jumpshot. That was the last time I gave a thought to yet another famous stranger I didn’t give a fuck about dying.
Michael Jackson’s Kids
Alaska - they look like japanimation characters
Blockhead – They showed their faces? As far as I know, they look like Saudi Arabian women.
Wives of Politicians and Athletes Who Cheated on Them
Alaska – thats what you get for being frigid
Blockhead – Tiger Woods is a nerd who got rich and famous. This allowed him to live out all his sexual fantasies. I honestly don’t see how anyone can hate him…except his wife but fuck her anyway.
The Cast of New Moon
Alaska - I dont know anyone in this but they all strike me as high school drama kids doing an episode of dawsons creek for their school play.
Blockhead – I don’t hate the cast nearly as much as the retards who made this movie as big as it was. if it wasn’t for some good porn, I’d suggest rounding up all teenaged girls and dumping them off a cliff.
Rihanna
Alaska - If i have to hear any more about how brave she is i might choke her out
Blockhead – She’s beginning to have patti labelle hair and that’s not a good look for anyone.
Ryan Oneil
Alaska - You look like a lesbian
Even I’m not old enough to remember who the fuck this guy is. I know he fucked his daughter or something but who cares? Micheal Jackson died yo!
Balloon Boy
Alaska – Hey dick, at least do the world a favor and fall to your death, instead of just hiding in the shed or whereever the fuck you hid
Blockhead – This was the year of shitty parents whoring their shitty kids with hopes of making some shitty reality show that would be watched by shitheads.
Terminator Salvation
Alaska – Is how i imagine herpes will feel in the future, boring and painful to look at.
Blockhead – Didn’t see it. I was too busy watching “baby boy” on cable 4 times a day for the last 5 months.
Employee Is Shakin’ The Spot
Tuesday, December 29th, 2009
It’s been fun. Stay tuned to the blog. A new contributor will be arriving sooner than later.
Peace,
Employee
Frank & Tech: What really happened?
Monday, December 28th, 2009
This was brought to our attention at the PhilaFlava forums last week. Here is the blog in question with the story in its original form.
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The 2009 Register Vol.10: Keen One
Monday, December 28th, 2009
Ah, 2009. The dirty whore of a year that let me fingerbang her in the backseat of my mom’s Reliant K. If she didn’t get so god damn clingy after that I may have enjoyed her more. What did she REALLY bring us other than Slap Chop, Precious, and a shitty Snoop Dogg album (c’mon Uncle Snoop. I’ve been ridin’ for you since we were the same body type back in 1992. Do another ‘Blue Carpet’ or stop. Please)? Nothing. Except a gang of dead celebs which weren’t named Asher Roth- a glaring oversight on the part of Death, if you ask me.
The Best Remix Of The Decade You’ll Never Hear About
Monday, December 28th, 2009Boards of Canada being given this track can only be chalked up to pure genius. Beck’s startlingly bleak, resonating yarn spun of woe and his vocal nuance were clay to be molded by the minds of BOC. Where the original spares itself in dramatics; opting on a cough syrup-soaked lightness, BOC’s imagining is headswirlingly-layered and seemingly empathetic in addition to aptly chasing chasing Beck’s lead. First we’re treated to the classic Reverse Fuzz Sunrise melody. As it begins to settle, your ears are filled with a wave of sonically-Pollocked drums in patterns conjuring up love, loss, lust and lies. But somehow retaining it’s oddly peaceful frame painstakingly crafted by BOC. Every time the snare falls over itself it demands attention and lands squarely on its feet. The mournful chants of Beck taking on an entirely new life by surfing above the wide open space offered by BOC. An enigmatic duo who take an ordinary song and reanimate all of it to a perfectly loud, nightmare/daydream with a beginning, middle, and end that make you want to be there.
I see you there
Your long black hair
Your eyes just stare
Your mind is turning
You know I’ll laugh
And I won’t take it back
I’ve seen your eyes I know
What you’re thinking
And one by one
We’ll shoot our guns
We’ll have fun
Don’t ever doubt it
And when I say
Fare thee well
My only friend
Oh how the days go
Your setting sun
Your broken drum
Your little drugs
I’ll never forget you
Never
Forget
You
Peace,
Employee
The 2009 Register Vol. 9: Selfsays
Saturday, December 26th, 2009
Before, I start I would like to say that I am very flattered to be asked to be a part of the 2009 register and share my views on the year that was. Alright here we go then…2009 was a year that brought such curve balls as celebrity death, Balloon Boy, and the rise of Twitter. Twitter has probably always been on the rise but I wasn’t aware of it, then later became addicted to it this year. Truth be told, I found out about Balloon Boy among other news this year through Twitter. Is that shameful I got a lot of news this year through Twitter? My mom would probably say so. Me, I don’t know how to quite answer that. Maybe, I will have a better answer for you during The 2010 Register. On a side note, the day I recorded my vocals for my song that appears on the PhilaFlava Project, was the same that day Michael Jackson passed.
